CH-CH-CH-CHANGES
Today I am thinking about change.
Heraclitus, a Greek philosopher, is quoted as saying "change is the only constant in life."
And one of my old therapists said to me, as I was processing the grief I carried after my father died, “The only thing permanent is impermanence.”
People are so afraid of change. I get it.
Change isn't my favorite thing, either.
But change has always been there for me, well, since I was born. I embraced it and always knew, it would be there.
And I think it really slapped me in the face after my father passed. Change hits different, you know?
In a way, I see change as a friend. *sings ch-ch-ch changes by David Bowie*
There's a sense of wonder, openness, and opportunity with change.
Because guess what?
Nobody actually wants to stay the same.
It's kind of absurd, lol.
We loatheeeeeee change but we also crave it.
Nobody likes being in the mundanity of life for too long.
It's what makes us human.
Change has been on my mind so much because I am going through a LOT of changes right now.
I am currently putting up furniture for sale on Craigslist, packing boxes, reaching out to friends to foster my plant babies, and researching storage units while my partner and I plan the first leg of our life abroad.
I am also learning that my gender identity (or sometimes, lack thereof) is a shapeshifter. I am figuring out how to process each day, knowing that sometimes I wake up and feel both masc and femme, other days I feel nothing, and some days I feel a multitude of different expressive energetic beings in my body.
My partner and I are going on being together for ten years. Seeing old photos of us when we first met in our early twenties to now, finding white hairs and wrinkles and knowing that these physical manifestations are symbolic for how much we've changed. It is a miracle that we've changed so much together vs change so much apart.
My whole life is different from even just a week ago.
My partner and I spend our New Years Eve, doing our version of this incredible Life Audit.
I am going to take a risk and be extra vulnerable here, because I want to you to see what it's like being in my brain, heart, and soul.
I want you to see how big I dream and how I give myself permission to dream THAT big.
I hope this serves as inspiration for you to claim your dreams and aspirations.
This is my personal Life Audit, with 100 of my wishes I hope to see and experience in life.
Doing this Life Audit was eye opening. There were things that I thought would be way more of a priority to me, and I got curious…for example:
I thought community and creativity would be much bigger, so at first I thought okay maybe this isn't as much of a priority to me as I thought it was
Then I realized, it wasn't a priority because I already HAVE such a beautiful community in my life and I have and do practice my creativity each and every day. So of course, my cups are full on that end!
And of course, as you see in my Life Audit, wealth seems to always be one of the most important pillars to me. This was VERY affirming for me and the career/life path I chose, because at times I have doubted that. I also saw that my wealth wishes were not always tangible financial goals, but really about holistic wealth.
Doing this Life Audit made me realize one really huge transformation.
I am not afraid of my dreams.
And I am not afraid of the changes and risks I will need to make and take in my life to get there.
Sure, I have “fears” (don't we all?) about all these things…
Will people reject who I truly am?
Can I trust myself?
What if I fail?
But at the end of the day, I know that none of that is going to stop me from embracing my desires to get to where I want to be.
Even if it means, I have to change.
Even if it means, I WILL change.
My whole life is already changing as I take one step at a time towards some of these dreams (like, hiking the O Trek in Patagonia an 80+ mile hike - which is happening this March🤯)!!!
So this money love letter is a cheers to change.
I'm so grateful for the changes in my life.
I don't think life would be worth living, if change didn't exist at all. :')
Stay Shiny,
