I HAVE TO BELIEVE.

I'm going to be real with y'all, I am not doing so well this week.

I mean, I'm also doing okay in some ways. 

But last weekend, and the start to this week was so heavy on my heart and soul.

I am heartbroken. Angry. Disappointed. Feelings of hopelessness have come up within me.

I usually try to stay optimistic, but my spirit is just tired.

All the mass shootings, witnessing how disassociated human beings are from one another, a protestor's death, and just taking all of that in and wondering if all this darkness in the world will ever transform into something better.

Because this week, I felt like it was all pointless and I have been contemplating if I had any more hope for the world.

The NRA has so much power.

Too much power.

I am on a rabbit hole search of how this came to be, why, and honestly asking myself the question:

Is it possible to beat the NRA?

I don't know. But I keep coming back to two things:

• We desperately, desperately need to heal.

• Money is a powerful tool.

The above are two things we actually can, to an extent, have some agency over.

There is no one size fits all when it comes to healing. But I do know this:

healing is something that is done, together.

You cannot heal, by yourself, on your own.

Healing is also not a destination. It's a journey. There is no “end” when it comes to our mental and spiritual health.

It is on going, and something that requires community.

So how do we claim our agency when it comes to healing?

I think that this will be different for everyone. I will speak from my own experiences.

My journey was always investing in my mental health by seeing a therapist. Therapy saved my life. Multiple times.

I am one of those friends that if anyone comes to me with any struggles they are having in their life or around their mental health I'll always ask, “Are you in therapy?” or “Have you tried therapy?”

I don't do this to be annoying. I truly believe in therapy because I would not be alive today without it and I know the benefits of therapy. Even when I am in emotional distress, pain, or experiencing a challenging moment - I know that I will get through it with all the support I've received in therapy.

Mental health isn't as accessible that it should be, I know that.

But there are free and accessible resources that do exist. 

I have known so many people that receive incredible therapy through Medicaid (myself included). I know there are some hoops to jump through when it comes to searching for a provider, but trust me. There are free resources and spending that time and energy on your search is not only going to benefit you, but it will benefit your loved ones. Your community. The world.

I deeply believe that if mental health was not a taboo, we'd see less violence, less mass shootings, and a whole lot more love and kindness.

Now of course, I've got to talk about the power of money as a tool.

It honestly ANGERS me SO much that money is so powerful. Because that's why the NRA is so powerful.

The NRA has a whole lot of freaking money!

The NRA also has a whole lot of freaking people!

5 million members, to be exact.

So, when you have money, and you have people, that come together for a cause (in this case, it's guns)…well yeah, it's going to be powerful.

The NRA buys politicians. The NRA buys organizations and corporations.

Money is powerful.

So how do we take our money, organize it within our community, and fight back for the world we so desperately need?

A world where children aren't being shot at in school.

A world where our elderly AAPI community can dance and celebrate the Lunar New Year together without being killed.

A world where every single human is not seen as disposable.

A world where we all heal together and thrive together.

We all forget that we can take responsibility.

Even if you might think that it doesn't go a long way.

My life's mission is to leave this world better than I was born into it.

I make every single dollar of mine count because I know that a dollar isn't just a dollar.

It's not just a piece of paper, or a number in my bank account.

It has meaning.

It has power.

And it can be used as a tool to ripple into our communities around us.

I'm here to tell you to make your dollar count.

Because I believe you can.

I have to believe it. For me. For us. For our community.

Now I want to hear from you.

How are you going to make your dollar count?

Hit reply to this e-mail with your reflection. ❤

Stay Shiny,

p.s. If you have the means, please consider donating to the victims of the Monterey Parkand/or the Halfmoon Bay mass shootings. Both fundraisers have been verified. Here is a resource from the folks at Stop AAPI Hate if you want to learn more about how you can support.